The comfort zone

In my work as a life coach, I have come across many people who make choices they end up regretting. In most cases, these choices fall in their comfort zone. The truth is that your brain is wired in such a way that it thrives towards what’s acquainted and rejects what’s unknown. But why would anyone not want to get the best out of life? Or make choices that will bring down their confidence? Or even a career choice that leaves them with regrets? The straightforward answer is because they consider their comfort when making these choices. Why is this so? Imagine that you undertake activities repeatedly. Over time your mind tends to be at home with it, it becomes a part of your lifestyle. It’s like magic. Your mind literally does what it is comfortable with or is used to and rejects what it is not accustomed to.

It’s just like little children who like the same things everyday like food or cartoon or the same book. When presented with a different choice, they don’ t like it. Do you notice that their lives are centered on those things they are comfortable with and for the rest they are not interested. They will want to be around their mum or dad because their mere presence makes them feel safe. That is how our minds function and why we make the choices that we do. Our minds configuration is built in that way.

Why you make certain choices

I have some clients who chose the same things every time regardless of how it affects their confidence, their relationships, their career. Imagine a girl who is comfortable dating losers. According to her, she grew up not being appreciated by her father who cared less about her and her future.  She grew up being underappreciated and was comfortable with it. If she meets a guy who treats her the way her dad did, or even worse, she likes him more because her mind has accepted that kind of treatment. But if the guy is nice, she wants little or nothing to do with him because he is too good for her.

Let me tell you a secret

It is a natural phenomenon for us as humans to constantly get used to those things that are not good for us. A process of change will cost us so much pain and time to go through it. It is not easy changing a habit. It takes time. And one has to be resilient and show dedication towards getting used to a new way of life. That is what makes us human: we adapt.

Each time you face a situation where you have to change things in your life or around you, you have to bear in mind that the process will not be easy. But if you persist till the end, you will discover that it was worth it. And even when this new habit or system seemed impossible to achieve, once you achieve it, you simply get used to it.

It is not easy

When you begin a new career or enter a new line of business, initially it will not be easy to get things going and make them work for you. You have to spend time learning how this new system works and building your confidence. This process of learning is not easy. But if you get past this process, you become fine-tuned to what the business or career is all about. And from here on, you are good to go. And during this process of learning, your mind establishes a connection to this business or career and you get used to all you do and can execute everything properly.

That is a simple truth. If you engage yourself in an activity or something, over time, you get used to it. That is how people achieve all they desire, they work for it. It might be painful but they do it anyway. So if you want to be successful, get money, have a good career, or a successful relationship, you have to work for it.

The psychology behind getting used to things

Our experiences whether good or bad, influence the way we deal with things and with people.

Now for you to get rid of the bad habits and get used to new ones, you must let go of the past. You cannot have a successful relationship if you don’t let go of the heartbreak you experienced in the past. You cannot have a successful career if you don’t let go of the setbacks you encountered in the past.

Before you set off, take a little time and reflect on those things you want to change. Draw up a list of these things, preferably begin with the simple ones. If there is a habit you want to get rid of, look for the opposite of that habit and work on trying to get used to it. After that, you begin your self-rehabilitation process. Be mindful of the fact that this process will not be easy. But you have to take it little by little, day by day until you can either let go of the bad habits and get used to the good ones.

Final Thought

Be aware of the many qualities you possess. Some of them you might have discovered. Some others are hidden somewhere inside of you. Be aware that you possess talents and skills peculiar to you that were given to you. And with them, you also possess the extraordinary drive, ambition, and self-belief that you need to get you going. Know that when you combine these talents and skills, together with your drive, ambition, self-belief, work ethic, and determination, it makes you unstoppable. You are like a moving train. Every situation you face in life, you can handle it with ease.

Sign up to my newsletter to receive motivational stories, new workshop announcements, exercises to do at home and coaching tips to use in daily life.

Or book a call with me.